It’s weird thinking about where I was at the start of the last decade. It was 2010 and I was halfway through my junior year of high school. I was still adjusting to my new school environment, after having to transfer when my beloved all-girls catholic high school officially closed its doors. I was starting a new chapter just as the world was transitioning into a new decade. So many milestone moments happened for me this past decade: I graduated from high school, passed my road test (after many attempts), earned my Associates and Bachelor’s degrees, met my biggest inspiration, and started an online magazine, just to name a few.
December was a hectic month, especially working retail. I felt like all I did was work. With the semester coming to an end and the approach of the holidays, I was mentally and physically exhausted from Black Friday up until Christmas Eve eve. Between studying for my final and working long hours I felt like I would never catch up on sleep. I did manage to take some time for myself though, and found some peace in new music, TV and movies that dropped before and after Christmas.
It's been a bit since I've updated on book club, but we're still going strong. We've been meeting monthly and I was been able to reach my Goodreads challenge goal for the year! Although not everyone has loved every book, I've liked that we're taking the time to read and then come together and discuss and analyze each book, whether we loved or hated it. I feel like it's getting me back into the groove of looking at literature critically and I missed having the opportunity to do that. So, without further ado, here are the books we read in August, September and October:
In the spirit of being determined to write more on here, I figured I'd share some things I have been loving this past month. From delving into podcasts to my favorite new TV show, here are a few things that made my November exciting:
Last Wednesday, I had the pleasure of attending Julia Michaels Inner Monologue tour. It was everything I imagined it would be and more. It was full of magic, love, acceptance and vulnerability wrapped in a warm hug of camaraderie and balloons.
In early October, my friend Sarah came to visit lil ole me on Long Island. We've bonded over our love for Sara Bareilles for quite some time, and she finally announced a tour! We knew we had to go together and Sarah had never been to New York so it was the perfect opportunity. We bought the the tickets sometime early this year and it came and went so quickly.
In the ever growing age of the internet, social media, and a world full of distractions I've found it rather difficult to stay on top of reading. In recent years, I've noticed that if a story doesn't pull me in almost immediately I either don't finish it or it takes me an exuberant amount of time to get through it. Having grown up through words, depicting stories of some of my favorite characters, it's been disheartening for me to have fallen so far off the wagon.
There's a lot they don't tell you about growing up. They don't tell you how hard it's going to be when you're saying goodbye to your high school friends, and how transitioning to college life isn't like the movies. They don't tell you that heartbreak comes in many forms, and you'll experience it when you have to let go of things like the dance studio you built a home inside of, or friendships that just seem to fade into the background until suddenly that person is no longer in your life. They don't tell you that post-grad life is a confusing, stressful overwhelming time that will feel almost inescapable. They don't tell you what your 20's are really like. They romanticize the crap out of everything. The best four years of your life will surely not be the ones spent in the hallowed halls of your high school where your stress amounts to deadlines and which of your friends is in your lunch period. At this point in my life, high school feels like it was another century where my worries, fears, and doubts were vastly inconsequential. College was rewarding and I miss it, but I wish I took more initiative. I wish I had even the slightest clue at where I was headed and thought more about what comes next rather than live in ignorance.
I haven’t written a blog post in quite some time. I feel like this is how I always preface these now: “Sorry, it’s been awhile. I’m going to try to write some more!” It never seems to work out that way though. Life tends to get in the way, along with my internal battle with perfection, and the fear that resides within me. They conspire against me and convince me that my words aren’t reaching anyone. That I’m not original enough. That what I’m sharing is just variations of the same thoughts and feelings over and over again. That my repetitive outlook on life is becoming worn out and I have lost every drop of creativity I once had. It feels like I’m wrapped up in this vicious cycle.
Last weekend, the 60th Annual Grammy Awards, one of music's biggest nights, aired on CBS. There were some incredible performances including Kesha's powerful and inspiring rendition of her song Praying, Pink's raw, artistic performance of her song "Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken" and Logic's words in support of women and immigrants. Esteemed artists like Ed Sheeran and Bruno Mars were amongst the winners of the night bringing home the Grammys for Best Pop Vocal Album/Best Pop Solo Performance (Ed) and Album of the Year and Record of the Year (Bruno). There were a few controversies this year, including the number of male winners significantly outweighing the number of females (there was one female winner), but one, in particular, resonates with me