"It's scary to face the real world and deal with issues. She's an anchor for so many people, that of course you find a community in. But when you let go of the anchor, you start to drown. And nobody wants to drown, that's stupid. So you either keep holding on or you teach yourself to swim and let go."
At 21 years old I've found that I've been through a lot. I've had my ups and I've had my downs, and through it all I've been taught a lot of lessons. Lessons that I realized myself or lessons passed onto me by the special people God has brought into my life. Since I started college I've improved academically, but I've also changed personally. I've become stronger, braver and more passionate. I've gained a little more experience and as a result a broader perspective. I've come into my own and I've become more aware of who I am and who I want to be. As a result, I have a deeper appreciation for myself and my values and the identified the toxicity that I desperately need to remove. I wanted to share a few things I've learned a long the way.
It's #selfworthwednesday, my favorite day of the week. The day I remind all of my twitter followers and Dream On Youth supporters that they are worthy of life, love and happiness. I've been a part of the DOY team for almost a year now and I've realized I've grown a lot since then. I've opened myself up, I've pushed myself to experience new things and now I'm learning that I'm still getting to know me. I've always subconsciously known that I don't put myself first, that I let people walk all over me and take advantage of me. It's been happening for years, it's still happening. The only way it can and will stop is if I choose to do something about it. And I've decided to do just that.
*I do not take credit for image above*
In the past week I've learned a lot. About myself, about my friends and how I've been treating myself. I discovered this: I don't put my happiness first. I think of how what I'm going to do will affect my mom, or my boss or a friend. My first thought is not: I'm going to do this because I want to and I don't care what happens. To be honest I do care. I care a lot. I care how other people will react to said decision, and I care how it will affect others in the end. I'm afraid of choosing me over other people. I let the happiness and comfort of others outweigh my own. As usual one of my dear friends and favorite boss lady's Cydney Irby reminded me of this: "You shouldn't (feel guilty for doing things for yourself)! Your 20's are supposed to be the years you do things for you without guilt! You're young!" I spend so much time worrying about other people that I don't think of me! Well if I've learned anything at all this summer it's that being selfish, in good taste, is okay. Yes you read that right. I am telling you to BE SELFISH.
It's 1:18 in the morning and all I can think is why do we criticize? Why do we judge? What gives us as individuals the right to assume how another person lives based on how they look, dress or act. What authority do we have on what should or shouldn't be considered normal? How did our society come to this point? Has it always been this way? Was there ever a time when people went through their everyday routine without sticking their nose up at someone else?